24hr Support Line 0800 6300 443

Category: Blogs

Menopause: My Story

Posted on by Imogen Lawrence

World Menopause Day – 18.10.22

I was in my late twenties and working as a Head Person in a flat racing yard when I initially started struggling with tiredness.

I was exhausted whilst doing the job I had always done, or even just walking up the stairs in my cottage, my heart beating like I had run a race. I put it down to being under the weather and so I carried on with this feeling, a feeling that seemed to come in waves throughout the year, coming and going – I just thought that was me.

I started feeling anxious, too, sometimes for no apparent reason. I was waking up at night running through the next day in my head, not being able to clear my thoughts even though I knew there was nothing to be anxious about – again I thought it was just me. I started avoiding talking to people to have less to think over in my mind in the middle of the night. 

Months could pass and I would be ok, so I thought maybe it was a bug I had picked up somewhere and just carried on. I had never been one for going to the doctor EVER – I always felt I was wasting their time, and mine sometimes, so rarely went.  I’d always had irregular periods ever since starting them, sometimes I could go months without one, so I wasn’t concerned that I hadn’t had a period for as long as I could remember – who likes them anyway?

As it happens, I never had another period. 

I started getting night sweats; waking up dripping wet and having to change my bedclothes.  Again, I thought I had a bug – maybe a serious infection… Google was not my friend at this point!  I reluctantly went to the doctor to discuss my symptoms and she sent me for a blood test. The results revealed I had Premature Ovarian Failure (since renamed Primary Ovarian Insufficiency). I felt shocked, I was in my thirties – how?

My husband and I had put off having a family because of work and now I was being told it was too late. Failure was how my condition was described and that is how I felt to be honest. I really struggled for a while. My husband was great about the whole thing but I hated not being able to make him a Daddy. I had to carry on in my senior position at work, watching life carry on – colleagues having babies, being happy for them whilst crying inside for me and my husband. 

I then found out that I had borderline Osteopenia, a condition that reduces the mineral content of bone tissue, and I needed to start Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT) straight away to save my bones from weakening. I was given leaflets to read and I had to decide what to take; I had no clue what to do and basically picked a drug off the list that had what sounded like the least side effects! Luckily, the one I picked was a great choice and the night sweats stopped very quickly, but the feeling of failure has stayed with me and I still don’t like Mothers’ or Fathers’ Day much. 

I really wish I had asked for support, but at the time I didn’t know there was any available for me – I was too young to be in this situation and felt embarrassed to reach out. I now know that this is not the case and help is there, you just need to ask.

Menopause should not be a secretive subject. It should not be something you just get on with and expect to go through when you reach a certain age, it should be talked about over a cup of tea and be made to be a far less embarrassing subject. Sharing symptoms and experiences can help you realise you are not going mad and you are not alone.

By Beck Edmunds, Regional Community Executive at Racing Welfare.

For 24hour emotional support call Racing’s Support Line on 0800 6300 443.

 

Simon Bailey’s Blog – World Mental Health Day 2022

Posted on by Imogen Lawrence

Simon Bailey’s Blog – World Mental Health Day 2022

Monday 10th October

The theme of World Mental Health Day for 2022 is: ‘Make mental health and wellbeing for all a global priority’. Just reading through this year’s title makes me feel like the task is too huge. In turning on the news or buying a newspaper it is not difficult to see how the anxiety of people can be raised just by listening to headlines. If I thought about tackling world mental health, then the task would seem impossible but, as always, we are reminded about our responsibility in changing the environment that we can affect. If, as individuals, we start to make a difference in our own areas of influence, we can hope that others are doing the very same in theirs.

Hope has been the keyword that I have used during other mental health awareness campaigns, and I can feel my anxiety levels rising by trying to come up with a different message. The fact remains that in the horse racing industry and the towns that we serve, hope really is what is needed. In talking about sport, we cannot ignore that the people who work in our industry are affected by health issues, the current energy crises, the rumours of war etc. As chaplains, we have the responsibility to hear peoples’ fears and to try to put some of these in perspective. In listening we are telling people that we care enough about their problems and want to walk with them through difficult times.

The great part is seeing what we do in partnership. Where we cannot help, then we know there are organisations who can. For practical help, Racing Welfare have seen initiatives like the financial grants for racing staff well used and much needed. These can be a great start to better mental health as they can ease the pressure of rising costs during the winter months.

Again, relationship is something I often talk about. Chaplaincy, in relationship with racing’s organisations offers a fuller support than just being a stand-alone service. Whatever the issues of an individual are, there is help available if staff need it. And so, the message for this year is again one of hope. My hope for the future was from a reading many years ago. In facing adversity, the words “Do not worry…” jumped off the page. It doesn’t need to be extensive counselling, though this could help some. It just needs to be the right words at the right time, no matter how simple and we can change perspective on our lives.

There is help available and it is my hope again this year that it will be used and appreciated more than ever.

In hope,

Simon

Volunteero of the week – Lesley

Posted on by Imogen Lawrence

75 year-young Lesley lives on a farm with her husband, two dogs and 19-year-old pony Storm, near Alnwick Northumberland. Lesley is a very busy lady. Between working at a local law firm, spending time at the stables or riding Storm, Lesley still finds time to volunteer for Racing Welfare as a telephone befriender.

Lesley’s motivation to join Racing Welfare as a befriender was a very personal one as she told us “I lost a very dear friend and Racing Welfare were so good to him, I wanted to do this on his behalf”.

Lesley signed up to volunteer with Racing Welfare in 2021 and after completing their application and training process, she was matched to befriend an 88-year-old lady who had been widowed. Since then Lesley has been phoning her every week and the two have created a unique bond built on dry humour.

Describing this relationship, Lesley told us “she’s fantastic, speaking with her is the highlight of my week, she is just so funny and very feisty”.

In total, Lesley has dedicated over 33 hours of her time as a telephone befriender for Racing Welfare which is an amazing impact. And of course, Lesley also benefits from her volunteering, telling us “I really enjoy it, it’s like speaking to an old friend, we have such a laugh”.

 Lesley has also been involved with some additional volunteering for the organisation, she told us of a time she and the North Regional Welfare Manager, Lucy took a road trip to Kelso to promote Racing Welfare at a large event. Her role was to help promote awareness at their stand, but not content with that Lesley decided to take herself off around the event.

Armed with a collection bucket, she spoke to almost everyone at the event, even in the secretarial tent!

After just a couple of hours of chatting away and shaking her collection bucket, Lesley had raised a total of £275 for Racing Welfare!

Lesley, we think your volunteering efforts are tremendous. Thank you for everything you do!

If you’d like to know more about how your charity can improve the experience for your volunteers and save a great deal of time in the process, please get in touch or book a demo.

 

Originally written by Josie at Volunteero, the provider of our volunteer management system.

 

Mental Health Awareness Week – Simon Bailey

Posted on by plane

The theme of this years Mental Health Awareness Week is loneliness. The thought that loneliness is closely linked to poor mental health is a sad one. Feelings of loneliness are personal and differ from person to person. There can be times when we are in a room full of friends, seemingly enjoying ourselves, but deep down have a sense of being alone.

I am writing this blog alone. There are times during our day when we can get on with our ‘to do’ list without distractions from anyone else and this is one of those times for me. Being alone for a time can be healthy. It can be a time for reading and reflection, meditation, listening to music or listening to nature. All these things enable good mental health. In my times alone I can concentrate better, but I know that being alone for a while is fine because I am not lonely. Family is the reason that I am not permanently lonely – it is reassuring to know that during the day I have someone who will make sure I am okay.

For some, though, there is no family to check in on them. At Racing Welfare we have seen how our Check-In and Chat phone calls have made a huge difference to people’s lives. Beneficiaries knowing that they are going to receive a call during the week from someone who is interested in hearing their stories has been quite a success. And the good news is we can all take time out of our schedules to contact someone who is on our mind. Not only will we feel the benefits of this ourselves but, more importantly, the people that we contact will feel cared for, too – it might be the only call they get all week. Loneliness really is one of the saddest themes I have spoken about – it is also one of the easiest topics to correct. I urge you all to think about someone this week who might benefit from a check-in, either in person or by phone. We are relational creatures who thrive in partnerships. Let’s enable somebody else to thrive this week.

 

Simon Bailey, Chaplain to Horseracing

Management Support Service in Action – a huge benefit to our industry.

Posted on by plane

We have asked staff from across the racing industry to explore some of the services on offer through Racing’s Support Line which is now delivered in partnership with Care first. In part three of the series, industry employee Lucy Baker is relieved to find some help from the Management Support Service…

I don’t know about you, but I often find understanding horses can be a lot simpler than understanding people.  Certainly, when I came into the racing industry it was because of my love of horses and my passion for racing, not because of my outstanding people skills.  However, from my very first job in the industry as a junior member of stable staff straight out of the racing school I knew I had joined a fantastic community.

Need Some Practical Help? Our Telephone Information Specialists are Here to Help

Posted on by plane

We have asked staff from across the racing industry to explore some of the services on offer through Racing’s Support Line which is now delivered in partnership with Care first. In part two of her series, industry employee Lucy Baker discovers that Telephone Information Specialists can provide practical support for everything from consumer issues to housing advice and so much more…

Do you remember being a child and spending hours daydreaming of your future life as an adult? Dreaming of all the freedom that lay ahead, of finally doing what you want when you want and not answering to anyone?  Oh, how naive we were!  

In The Moment Support from Racing’s Support Line – First hand experience

Posted on by plane

We have asked staff from across the racing industry to explore some of the services on offer through Racing’s Support Line which is now delivered in partnership with Care first. In part one of the series, industry employee Lucy Baker finds out more about in the moment support and why this is something that we could all benefit from…

Bad day at home, bad day at work, stress, frustration, overwhelmed; sometimes it can all just feel a bit too much.  You understand what I’m talking about, don’t you? It’s not just me that feels this way, is it? Tell me I am not alone here?!